When God Brings Us Flowers by Brandy Wallner
Wedemolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against theknowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient toChrist. - 2 Cor. 10:5 NIV
Graypuffy clouds loomed as I stepped outside and slid my key inside my pocket.Maybe the endorphins produced by a brisk walk would help show my dear,not-so-sweet, inner critic the door.
She’dstarted whispering in my ear the night before, pushing doubt and fear into allthe hopeful spaces of my mind.
“Youwon’t know where to start tomorrow morning,” she said, referring to the piece I had planned to write the nextmorning. It was Friday. One day each week that I allowed myself the freedom todig into the work of becoming a professional writer. But on this particularFriday, going for a walk seemed the best I could manage.
“Youbit off more than you can chew this time.”
“Youwant to write about who God is? Really? So you’re a theologian now?”
She wasreferring to the next installment of my blog series. One for which I feltill-equipped to write, but that I knew God had placed on my heart.
Fearand self-criticism kept pace with me as I walked down our narrow street. I wasso frustrated.
It hadbeen just a few months earlier that I’d prayed for release from the strongholdof fear and perfectionism. I remembered the night vividly, our small groupcrowded into our tiny living room, praying huge prayers. We’d asked God for Hispower – for release from bondage. And The Holy Spirit had felt very present inthe room.
In theweeks that followed, I began feeling freedom like I’d never known! I startedgiving myself more time to pursue my dreams; being more intentional with mygifts. Gifts that I’d previously considered unworthy of even being called gifts.
So withthe inner critic’s voice whispering once again, I felt defeated. Of course, I'danticipated that she might return but, I was still disappointed.
Sisters,the idea in scripture about taking every thought captive and making them obedientto Christ is there to help us combat the lies of the enemy. But sometimes itcan be difficult to hear God’s truth over the broken record that’s been playingin our ears since childhood.
Graciously,that morning God offered me something tangible as a reminder.
A rosepeeked through the slats of a neighbor’s fence, offering me a lifeline. Onewoven together by what was true, noble, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent, andpraiseworthy. Those words from Philippians came rushing back to me as I lingeredthere in front of that rose.
Ifocused on the gentle pink and yellow of each petal, layers of soft perfectionin bloom. Growth directed by God since the beginning of time. I took a deepbreath.
Beauty.
I’dalways been moved by it. Whether it was found in home décor or a cuteoutfit…beauty had always been important to me. And on this morning it felt likeGod was saying to me, “Focus on my beauty. It’s everywhere.”
It wasspringtime and every yard in the neighborhood was bursting with color, vibrancy,and strength. Purple Morning Glories, Yellow Black-Eyed Susan, and Lilacsucculent flowers…each of them unencumbered by the self-evaluation that plaguedme. Flowers simply relied on the Lord’s direction and allowed themselvesto be.
Irealized after a few minutes that the inner critic had fled. And that my mindhad been filled up with something – Someone – much strongerthan the accuser. The same Someone who promised to care for the lilies of thefield and me.
Thewords I wrote later that day weren’t perfect. They never will be. But God hadrevealed something I needed for my mind's protection…His Beauty.
Making things beautiful is what God does. In His time, He is faithful to complete the work He begins in us. And we can trust the truth of His word. It's when we focus on His voice and ponder His glory, that all other voices are dimmed.
Brandy Wallner is a freelance writer, content creator and blogger at brandywallner.com. Founder of a ministry called, A Good Conversation Dinner, she can be found obsessing over a good meal and home decor. She and her hubby reside in Southern California where they own a personal training studio.