Delivered Through by Jennye Bock

The fire lurked insidiously. From a distance. Shy at first, lacking show. A slow burn. Unseen—unless someone was looking. But she wasn’t.  And he wasn’t. 

When a new season arrived, the slightest hint of a scent surfaced, causing her to pause. Is something—is something burning? But with no flames, the thought soon left her—buried by distractions. Or denial.  Nothing’s burning.

One day, it came out of hiding—this fire, no longer slow or shy. One, two, then more angry flames met and multiplied. Thick dark smoke boiled and billowed, choking any attempt at a call for help. Heat hit her head-on as she felt her way forward, fumbling for something, anything, familiar. 

“Jennye.”

Did I just hear…a voice?  She wanted to speak, to shout, cry out amidst the fiery ambush. Yet she’d kept her voice silenced for so long, all she managed to utter was a trembling half-hopeful “Hello?” 

Flames reached their greedy arms, grasping for anything to gather into the burn. 

It carved its chaotic path. Through husband and wife, through a family of lives, through a past and present. Stealing and stripping away what had mattered. Then it grasped for her faith.  Her faith was what the fire was really after.

“Do not be afraid,” came a whisper.

There it was again—that voice.  A sense of peace replaced her panic.

As time crawled by, the burning began to slow. Flames flickered—less angry and proudly content with what they’d accomplished.  Ashes fell earthward as pale gray smoke lifted in sinister snake-like ribbons. Amidst the smolder, she found herself somehow still standing, surprised at having survived. When she gathered the guts to look through bloodshot eyes, she saw what she never dreamed she’d see. As her gaze was held hostage by the depth of destruction, her brain paralyzed by pain deep and raw, anger and anguish pressed heavily against the walls of her heart.  She stood in place, unable to move legs too weary to lift soot-covered feet.  Even time seemed not to stir.  With shoulders slumped and arms falling limp, she hung her head and squeezed her eyes closed. Yet tears pushed their way past. 

I… I cannot…go on. 

“Jennye.”  

Again, the voice. I must be dreaming. But curiosity caused her to look up, to see Someone. Oh!  You’re here.  With me!  He beckoned her to take a step, and then one more, moving forward through the wake of wreckage.  Along the way, she picked up pieces of the life she’d known. Single steps became a mile, then another and another.  She began to lift her head, feel stronger, and breathe again. 

One day, when she took another step, something felt foreign to the soles of her calloused feet.  She looked around to see she was no longer walking on ash-covered ground. The burn was now behind her. She’d stepped out into a different place, lush and green with life.  She looked up to the One who had beckoned her before—the One who’d been with her all along—the One she felt she now knew better than before the fire had begun.  He smiled.  She, too, was able to smile. She knew. He had delivered her through.

~

A fire once blazed its way through a decade of my life.  We were a family of seven—husband, wife, and five children—just entering a time of ministry overseas, when flames came. The years that followed were the hardest I’ve encountered. But I never walked alone through the fiery trial I faced.

“Now this is what the LORD says—the one who created you, Jacob, and the one who formed you, Israel—”Do not fear; for I have redeemed you; I have called you by your name; you are mine.  I will be with you when you pass through the waters, and when you pass through the rivers, they will not overwhelm you.  You will not be scorched when you walk through the fire, and the flame will not burn you.”  Isaiah 43:1,2 (CSB)

Jennye lives in Tulsa, OK with her fisherman husband, daughter, a dog named Cy and a cat named Tux. Between them, she and her husband have seven grown children.  She enjoys hiking, photographing in the outdoors, traveling, and early morning meditations in the cozy chair.  A walk on the beach before sunup, or coffee shop conversations with a friend are among moments that she cherishes.  She seeks to notice small wonders in ordinary days. She writes to encourage others along life’s journey, pointing them to the God who has walked her through fiery flames and deep waters.  You can find her on Instagram @jennyebock.