Constant Joy, Constant Jesus by Joy Allen
I awoke from a vivid dream recently. In my dream, I was standing out in the ocean where the bank breaks, before a large drop-off. I barely had my footing and could feel the push and pull of each swell as my body was surrounded by water. The ocean was strong, and after each wave hit, I felt manipulated and clumsy trying to establish a foothold. Push and pull. Push and pull. No let up, no rest, the waves just kept coming. I remember feeling the metaphorical intensity paralleling this season of life, desperate, I called out to Jesus. He came to me, and stood within the waves, a few feet away. As my gaze locked his I knew, I mean I just knew he was calling me in the midst of the waves to come to him. Stumbling through the water, I mustered up the courage to try. I was desperate for a grasp on constancy and awkwardly propelled myself towards him. When I did, the force of the waves stopped. Allow me to emphasize that: the force of the waves stopped. I didn't say the waves stopped, or that I didn't feel them surging but their power over me stopped. There was nothing graceful about it, I remember watching myself launch onto Jesus-much like a starfish with all appendages clinging. That's when I knew what I needed to do-grasp onto Jesus and hold on for dear life.
This past season of my life has been nothing short of the reality of that dream. I have felt tossed to and fro, overwhelmed and wearied, as water sputters out of my mouth. Looking at the never-ending streams of waves that come down the pipeline of life, I feel like something has got to give and I sincerely hope it’s not my sanity. The only thing that has helped and helped constantly has been clinging to Jesus.
Anyone else?
The truth is, our family had recently movedinternationally which included the following: career change, less income, lossof friends and our entire life was in upheaval. The waves of change broughtsteady streams of grief.
Grief is never easy. Wave after wave, blow after blow I felt my peace being eroded with the undertow of each hit: enter Jesus. And as always, Jesus is the game-changer. In the midst of personal pain, challenge and sorrow, the Prince of Peace met me. The greatest gift enduring this season blessed me with was the opportunity to cling wholeheartedly to Jesus.
Moments of sadness allowed me to unload my heart on him. I leaned in when the bittersweet seemed too much to bear. As tears flowed down my face again, and again and again I learned to turn to him in worship trusting if I gave him my ‘yes’ he would be faithful to lead, guide and give peace. Jesus never promised us that we would never feel the waves in life. He didn’t promise that following him meant we were given a house on Easy Street, and smooth sailing until his return. But he did promise this: he would always be with us. When I look back on my dream the feeling of the waves pushing me around is incredibly clear. But I don’t want to focus on the waves. I want to remember Jesus. I want to remember that even as I lifted my eyes, I knew I had to get to him, whatever it cost. I want to remember with greater clarity when waves hit, they lost their power over me when I clung to him. He held me, secured me, and stabilized me in his arms. It can be so easy to let the constant change of life pull at us, but I would rather let the constant pull of Jesus be what I hold onto most.
Joy Allen grew up in the Midwest and has served for the past 15 years in overseas mission work. In early 2019 she, along with her husband and three kids, relocated to Northern California. She enjoys strong cups of coffee, photography, and makes candles. She also loves being creative, getting active, is an avid mystery reader. Writing is one of her favorite things to do, you can read her blog at www.joyallenwrites.com where she freelances and writes avidly to encourage faith in Jesus through life lessons.